Sunday, December 16, 2012

Showing up

Showing up is not all of life - but it counts for a lot. 
-Hillary Clinton
A short list of changes since the accident:
  • Gyms (3)
  • Hair stylists (4)
  • Health insurance 
  • Doctors (3)
  • Credit union (almost)
  • Job role (3)
  • Employment status
  • Lawyers (3)
  • Family support
  • Car
  • Bike, clothing, and all equipment (stolen)

When Hacker Dojo announced it was moving to a new location, it wasn't really what I wanted to hear. The new building is 2 miles further down the road. I just kinda got used to where the old building is.

Physically speaking, Hacker Dojo is chairs and tables and couches and electrical outlets and a freaky fast fiberoptic connection. That's it. It has too many members for the current space. Also, the current warehouse would be too expensive to bring up to code. There's really no one to blame.

Sure I could just run away, but where would I go?

A month passed. It became clear that despite pleas for help, move tasks were being ignored. Stuff lying around would need to be dealt with. I'm not even talking about the huge wooden airplane hanging from the ceiling. The oversized public phone booth (blue!). The thing that looks like a vending machine but sells...electronics equipment. Someone else will have to address those.

I grabbed a box and started packing up the Library.

At first, resentment. What about my leadership skills? The guys walking on by, what are they doing that's so critical? Saving the world? Do they have to assume I'm the fucking admin here behind the front desk? Yeah, I make coffee too. How is this not like my job? Will the world ever take me seriously? Am I doomed to scrub the floors for other people?

In college I worked in food service. I am handy with a mop and its squeezer bucket thing. I can remove forks inserted into the wall by frat boys (probably Wall Street bankers by now). I'm still better than average at removing grease and tying large garbage bags. The resentment comes from wondering if this might be all I have to offer. Or, all that will be accepted from me.

Each day I took a whack at a few boxes. Filling with books, taping, labeling. After about 10 boxes and 3 days, the desk person thanked me.

I started glancing at the books as they went into the box. O'Reilly titles like Python for Data Analysis and JavaScript The Definitive Guide. Robot Modeling and Control. The Four Hour Body. The Feynmann Lecture in Physics. Hacking Across America (a guy with laptop open on a recumbent on the road). A Walk Across America.

All the books are donated. I started to appreciate the mystery folks who shared their books. The authors who share their experiences. Fellow seekers.

The World is Flat by Thomas Friedman. How to Find the Work You Love by Laurence G. Boldt. Both of these came home with me.

1 comment :

  1. Hacking Across America sounds intriguing... and terrifying. I can't imagine trying to type and ride at the same time.
    Good on you for helping. :)